The Joy of Parenthood

My two boys have shown a wonderful side of them - being perceptive and empathic. These are the qualities that I want my children to have. To say that I have succeeded in parenting is too soon, but I am grateful to see them blossom into good preschoolers.

I had a rough day at work today, and am pleasantly surprised that my eldest is able to detect my moodiness even though I have not displaced my unhappiness on them. He probably overheard part of the conversation I had with his father on the unpleasant experience at work. When he saw me spacing out at dinner, he asked if I am thinking about work. I think that it is not very often that a young child points out such observation and makes such a deduction. This is what I meant by being perceptive. I told him that he was right. The younger one, probably not knowing the story, then added that I ought not to be scared about what happened at work, he told me to 'just be fierce'. Sounds like the advice I give to him about dealing with naughty bullies at his preschool. I chuckled at the seriousness of their tone. I thanked them with a salute gesture and a 'Yes, Sirs!'.

The dinner continued and the elder asked if I think my desk in the study is messy. I said yes, and he told me to pack it up and if I did, he would reward me with 2 slices of pear. Interesting. He has learnt to reward good behaviour - or rather, using incentives to motivate good behaviour. The role reversal was quite funny and they are acting like me! Scary thought, but I pray that something good comes out of it.

At their bedtime, the elder one, while brushing his teeth, heard me hiccuping loudly, quickly got me my water bottle. The younger one, on the other hand, helped me to open my bottle and fed me the water. I thanked them, and praised them for their kindness. By now, my heart is filled with joy and gratitude.

A rough day at work ended with joy and happiness. My children have shown me kindness that I did not receive at work. This is what I have read about other people's experience, on how children, with their innocence and cheerfulness, touched their heart and helped them to overcome the harshness of the world. The negative experience becomes inconsequential and I am reminded of greater priority of my life.

I cannot predict the future but I want to capture these little moments of joy and be thankful for them. I feel that I am privileged to have such experiences with my children. In where I work, I have met many parents who do not have such privileges, partly because many of them have given up their role as parents. They feel that children are a burden, and they choose to pursue their own happiness, sometimes at the expense of their children's.

Perhaps life is not as accidental as it seems, and I believe to a great extent, that we reap what we sow. Some call it karma (2 people mentioned the word to me on separate occasions today). As parents, we have to be deliberate in our efforts in showing them our love and in teaching them the right values. Yet, life offers no guarantee, but the chance of our children showing us gratitude and love when we are old is increased.

The joy of parenthood comes with pains and sacrifices.