K2 Graduation

I attended my eldest's K2 graduation ceremony on Thursday, 10 November.
There were 2 skits put up by 2 groups of children in his class; one in English and one in Chinese. My eldest was a narrator in the English skit.

During the 3-month long preparation, which includes many rounds of rehearsing, I could sense his stress. He often took the teacher's words seriously and felt the need to put up the best show. From the beginning, the teacher emphasised her expectation of no mistakes and the requirement to memorise the script. In fact, when I picked him up from the centre one day, I witnessed the teacher practising the lines with a girl, the main character, who was in tears. She was later replaced and another girl took over the main role.

During rehearsals, the children's meal times were also delayed a few times and their afternoon naps forgone. A few children were in tears at various parts of the preparation, and a few children coped by fooling around and disrupting the rehearsals. On several occasions, my son woke up in the morning and fearing that he could not remember the lines, went through the script first thing in the morning before school. I believe the teacher's message to them was strong.

I talked to him about taking it easy, and tried to help him by going through the script. I recorded the script with him and suggested that he listened to it repetitively to help him remember. He did not use this method but he memorised it in his own way. In fact, these young children have good memory and if given time, they will be able to remember the lines after a few repetitions. So I felt that the teacher's overemphasis was unnecessary.

I approached the teacher once, and shared with her about the stress the children must be facing. She could not see from my perspective. She shared that the other children were ok and they did not seem to be too bothered. Another teacher in his class felt that the children need to be given stress. At the same time, she said that the delay in meal time had not been overdone. My contention is that the children may be too young to be given such stress. For the girl who was first chosen as the main character and then replaced, I wondered how that had an impact on her esteem. Children learnt about themselves from such experience.

The children did very well on the concert day. They remembered their lines, their actions, and they had coordinated their roles very well. Many parents were suitably impressed by what their children are capable of. As for me, I was overcome by a sense of disappointment. After all that stressing up and numerous rehearsals, the microphone failed to work on the actual day. The audience could not hear the children. It was a pity. They have been rehearsing with the microphones all these while and were unable to project their voices. But they did their best by speaking at the top of their voices. I hope that the adults appreciated them for their display of flexibility and professionalism.

Many parents went to thank the teachers for their guidance. I did not. I am grateful to them for giving my son the opportunity to play a role that he is good at. As a narrator, he has many lines to remember. Being able to read helps him to go through the script on his own. He has also gained confidence in himself from this experience. However, I still feel that it could have been handled better. I believe that the children could still have done a good job if the teacher has dealt with it more gently. She is a young teacher, and was coordinating her first K2 concert. She could have felt a great pressure to perform her duties, but I hope that she had been more sensitive to the children's needs.

As parents and as educators (teachers), we sometimes need to ask - whose needs are we meeting? We sometimes think that we are helping the children by pushing them beyond their limits. Giving them stress to help them to grow up? Are we doing that so that we can prove to others that we are capable parents and teachers? Pushing them may be necessary, but we have to be gentle. I believe we can help them get to where they are capable of going, but perhaps we can avoid being hasty.

The graduation marks the end of his preschool education and the start of formal education. While remaining hopeful, I still have much apprehension about the school education system in Singapore - the constant push for the best and the drive for excellence. I feel for the children. It will be a balancing act that I have to learn - balancing the need to keep up with the school's high expectation and the need to protect my child's need for innocence.

God bless me.