Enrichment Classes

With the proliferation of enrichment classes these days, it is not unusual to see many little children being put in more than a class at one time. There are many popular enrichment centres and some children need to be put on the wait list to get in. Do children need so many enrichment classes? One for Chinese, one for phonics, one for speech and drama, one for ballet or wushu, one for piano or violin. I was once a parent who put my eldest in a few classes at one go - swimming, piano, art and mental arithmetic. At that time there seemed so much for my 5-year-old to learn, and experts' opinion is that children learn best when they are young. But I have since learnt my lesson... My eldest attended more than one year of swimming lessons, though not with regular attendance as he was often not well. At the end of last year, he still could not swim and lacks water confidence. I decided to take him out as his interest was not there. I believe that he was not ready. At 7 this year, he still could not swim. Swimming is definitely a skill that is important to have, but I think I will wait a little longer to enrol him in a swim class...when he is more ready and physically stronger. Now that he is in primary school, he is down to 2 enrichment lessons. We cut it down partly because I am now a stay-at-home mum and we are financially more prudent. He is attending piano lesson and art lesson. He likes to draw but cannot draw well. So we enrolled him for art recently. As for piano, I feel that playing the piano is a skill that requires the use of several senses - the senses of touch, sight and hearing. It also requires the use of both hands, hence building strong synergy between the right and left brain hemispheres. It also encourages hand-eye coordination. Playing the piano is thus an important skill for academic learning. He didn't like playing piano very much, as it requires hard work. Nevertheless he plays about 5 times a week, and derives joy when he could play a piece that appeared daunting at first.  Yes, playing the piano also helps the child to grow up to be more disciplined. I am not hoping for him to be a great pianist, but for him to garner the skills and benefits of playing the piano. I noticed that a child in primary school tends to have many tuition classes. Some children who are poor in foundation may need that but many do so to boost their academic performance. I have heard of parents enrolling their children in brand named tuition centres only to engage another private tutor to help the child with the homework from the first tuition centre.  I wonder how the child manages. I am glad that I am able to coach my eldest in his studies and hence spare him the agony of running from one tuition centre to another. I am not all that versatile and knowledgeable,  but I learn along with him.  I am hoping that I won't be succumbed to the pressure of putting him for classes just to keep up with the rest. Do I want my child to out-perform his peers? I do, but to put him through the rat race just to show that he is capable is unnecessary. I admit that I feel disappointed when he did not score full marks for his tests when he told me that some of his classmates did, but I reflect on it, and decided that it is ok if he is not the best, (he has among the better ones though) , what is more important is that he enjoys learning. We cannot have the best of both worlds, and as parents have to make a decision on what is best for our child, and stick to our guns when he didn't get into the best class or touted as the star pupil.

Growing Up

It dawned on me that day that the little one has grown up. The younger one is five this year, and the change in him for the past few months has been quite significant. While he still looks very babyish and is certainly still the baby in the family by virtue of his birth order, he behaves more maturely now.  He participated in the school's concert 2 weeks ago, and was really serious in doing it well. He loves the dance so much that he would get into movement as soon as I hummed the songs.  His ability to "talk back" is good and I sometimes feel amused by his rational and logical reasoning. Of course I didn't praise him for talking back and kept the feelings of amusement to myself. On the whole, he has been more responsive to discipline and reasoning in the past few months. 2 years ago, he almost drove me crazy with his stubborn behaviour. He would hold back his tears and say that it didn't hurt when I beat him even though it clearly was. I hated the frequent battles with him, and little things triggered his temper tantrums. In retrospect, I think that phase was instrumental in helping him develop his ability to reason and manage his emotions now. Once we were talking about his behaviour in school, and he cried bitterly, feeling sorry for what he has done. I refrained from scolding him because he volunteered information of his misbehaviour to me. He was not defensive and nodded in agreement when I pointed out how his teacher has been kind and that being cooperative with the teacher is being helpful to the teacher. It is fun to hear him talk, and he continues to be very adorable and being a dear. However, I noticed that he has a strong sense of insecurity and tends to react to criticisms or negative comments about him. He is also prone to jealousy - another sign of insecurity! I have noticed that he often complained being neglected when I am having a conversation with his elder brother. I have tried to address that with him, pointing out his feeling of jealousy and assuring him of my love.   I like it when he repeated the phrase I said to him  "I love you more than you know!" in a serious tone. This phrase may be grammatically incorrect but what it means is that I love you more than you have perceived or understood.